Let us step out into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure.

punkbread:

when all your favorite people are online

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unsuccessfulmetalbenders:

we went upstate and my dog was being a butt and trying to swipe at fish in the lake and she fell in and when we dried her off she was still shivering so i put a sweater on her 

i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me:

I once had a drunk guy tell me I was too sexy to be shooting up at a party. He knocked the needle out of my hands and stepped on the pen, shattering the casing, telling me I should thank him by giving him my number and a kiss. It was my diabetes medicine.

(submitted by anonymous)

silohouettes:

I hate when a person says they’ve had a bad day and everyone, instead of trying to cheer them up, enters a competition of who’s had the shittest life


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Customer Service Problem #34

Unpleasant customers who complain and say they’d rather go somewhere else.

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New Video! | SHEPSEXUAL |

n0-p0st-0n-sunday:

pvnkslut:

If you pull me on your lap there is a 101% chance I’m going to make out with you.

i would advise you to avoid santa